Grammar and translation (Paper 1 Section A, Paper 2 Section A, Appendices 2 and 3)

Translate this passage into English. 日本の高校生の多くは、放課後に塾に通っている。塾は学校の授業を補うために利用されることが多いが、費用がかかるため、家庭の経済状況によって通えない生徒もいる。文部科学省はこうした格差をどう縮めるかという問題に長く直面してきた。

1. 01Read all three sentences first, and find the verb at the end of each

   The verbs are 通っている, いる (in ～生徒もいる) and 直面してきた. Reading them first tells you the shape of the whole passage before you translate a word of it: a present habit, an existential statement about a group of students, and a long-running situation. Note the readings you need: 放課後[ほうかご], 塾[じゅく], 補う[おぎなう], 費用[ひよう], 経済状況[けいざいじょうきょう], 格差[かくさ], 縮める[ちぢめる], 直面[ちょくめん], 文部科学省[もんぶかがくしょう]. If a kanji here were off the Appendix 3 list it would be glossed on the paper; you are not expected to guess at unlisted characters.

2. 02Sentence 1: 多くは is the subject, and ～ている here is a habit

   日本の高校生の多くは — the topic is many of Japan's high-school students, and 多く is a noun, not an adverb, so it is the thing the sentence is about. 放課後に is a time phrase, に marking when. 塾に通っている pairs 通う with に for a destination you go to repeatedly; ～ている with a verb like 通う is habitual, not progressive, so this is attend, not are attending right now. English: Many Japanese high-school students attend a juku after school. Keeping juku and glossing it, or writing a cram school, are both defensible; what you must not do is write school twice and blur 学校 with 塾.

3. 03Sentence 2, first clause: a passive with no agent, and ために as purpose

   塾は学校の授業を補うために利用されることが多い. 補う is transitive and takes 授業を; ために after a plain-form verb marks purpose, so this is in order to supplement school lessons. 利用される is the passive of 利用する with no stated agent, which English handles with a plain passive: are used. ことが多い nominalises the whole preceding clause with こと and then says it is frequent, so the natural English is are often used rather than the literal there are many cases in which they are used. English so far: Juku are often used in order to supplement school lessons.

4. 04Sentence 2, second clause: ため for reason, によって for variation, and a potential negative

   が here is the contrastive conjunction but, not the subject particle — position tells you which. 費用がかかる is the fixed collocation for something costs money; here が IS the subject particle. ため with no に and following a plain verb is reason, so because it costs money: the same three characters did purpose two clauses ago and reason here, and only the surrounding grammar distinguishes them. 家庭の経済状況によって is depending on the household's financial circumstances. 通えない is the negative potential of 通う — cannot attend, not does not attend — and ～生徒もいる means there are also students who. English: but because it costs money, there are also students who cannot attend, depending on their family's financial circumstances.

5. 05Sentence 3: an embedded question used as a noun modifier, and ～てきた

   こうした格差 is such disparities. どう縮めるか is an embedded question — how to narrow them — and ～かという問題 packages that whole question as the noun problem, which is the construction Appendix 2 lists as embedded questions using か. に直面する is to face something, so the ministry faces the problem of how to narrow such disparities. 長く直面してきた uses ～てきた for a situation that has continued up to now, which English renders with a perfect: has long faced. Give the ministry its English name and keep the Japanese available: the Ministry of Education, Culture, Sports, Science and Technology, 文部科学省.

6. 06Read the English back as English, and check the three danger points

   Now ignore the Japanese and read your English aloud. Does every sentence have a subject that a reader can identify? Is every negative still negative? Is every tense the one the Japanese chose? Those three questions catch the great majority of lost marks in this direction. Then check that you have not merged two scoring chunks into one by paraphrasing: 補うために, 費用がかかるため and 家庭の経済状況によって are three separate pieces of language, and a smooth English sentence that keeps only two of them has thrown a mark away.

Result: Many Japanese high-school students attend a juku, a private cram school, after school. Juku are often used to supplement school lessons, but because they cost money, there are also students who cannot attend, depending on their family's financial circumstances. The Ministry of Education, Culture, Sports, Science and Technology has long faced the problem of how to narrow such disparities. The passage's scoring chunks are the habitual ～ている, the purposive ために, the agentless passive 利用される, the frequency ことが多い, the contrastive が, the causal ため, によって, the potential negative 通えない, ～もいる, the embedded question どう～か, and the continuative ～てきた — eleven separate decisions, each of which can be earned or lost on its own.

You are translating into Japanese and each of these sentences needs a decision. (1) Japanese education is changing. (2) There is a problem with the examination system. (3) The book I read last year was about the ageing society. (4) In Japan it has changed, but in other countries it has not.

1. 01Sentence 1: an established topic takes は

   日本の教育は変わりつつある. 教育 is what the whole essay is about, so it is a topic, and は says so. Note also that は sets a scope: everything until the next topic marker is understood to be a comment on 日本の教育. That is precisely why the specification treats an unmarked change of subject as an error that prevents meaning — the reader is still following the topic you last declared. 変わりつつある is the ます-stem plus つつある, a more formal alternative to 変わっている for a change in progress, and it is worth having in an essay register.

2. 02Sentence 2: new information onto the stage takes が

   試験制度に問題がある. 問題 has not been mentioned; it is the news the sentence exists to deliver, so が. Writing 問題はある would say, as for the problem, it exists — implying the reader already knew of a problem and you are confirming it. This is the test to internalise: が introduces, は resumes. A useful corollary is that the answer to a question word takes が, because a question word can never be old information: 何が問題ですか is answered by 費用が問題です, never by 費用は問題です.

3. 03Sentence 3: inside a relative clause the subject takes が

   去年読んだ本は高齢化社会についてのものだった. If you make the reader of the book explicit, it is 私が去年読んだ本 and never 私は去年読んだ本 — a subordinate clause has no topic slot, so its subject is marked が. The main clause then takes its own は on 本, which is now the topic. This one rule removes a large share of intermediate-level errors and costs nothing to apply: whenever a clause is modifying a noun, its internal subject is が.

4. 04Sentence 4: contrast is what は is for

   日本では変わったが、他の国では変わっていない. Two は particles in one sentence normally signal contrast, and here they do exactly that. Note that both attach to では, not to に or で alone: では is the place particle で carrying a contrastive は on top of it, and it is the standard way to say as for in Japan, as against elsewhere. This is also where the mid-sentence が appears in its other role — the conjunction but — which is why identifying が by position rather than by memory matters.

5. 05The rule of thumb, and the one exception worth remembering

   The short version: が introduces and identifies, は topicalises and contrasts, and a subordinate clause always takes が. The exception worth carrying is that certain predicates take が where English takes an object — 日本語が分かる, 音楽が好きだ, 車がほしい, 時間が必要だ. These are stative predicates: the thing understood, liked, wanted or needed is grammatically the subject, and writing 日本語を分かる is a clear error rather than a stylistic slip.

6. 06Check by reading only your particles

   On a second pass, read the sentence out loud but only the particles: 日本の教育は…変わりつつある. Because Japanese marks roles rather than fixing them by order, the particle string alone is a skeleton of the meaning, and a wrong particle sounds wrong in that skeleton even when the sentence reads plausibly at speed. This is the cheapest checking routine in the language and it takes about ten seconds per sentence.

Result: (1) 日本の教育は変わりつつある。(2) 試験制度に問題がある。(3) 去年読んだ本は高齢化社会についてのものだった。(4) 日本では変わったが、他の国では変わっていない。The governing rules: が introduces new information and identifies; は sets a topic whose scope runs until it is replaced, and marks contrast; a clause modifying a noun takes が for its own subject; and stative predicates such as 分かる, 好きだ, ほしい and 必要だ take が where English takes an object.

Translate this passage into Japanese. Since the collapse of lifetime employment, the way young people think about work has changed. Many are made to work long hours, and some are transferred to distant cities by their companies. The government has introduced new rules, but their effect is not yet clear.

1. 01Sentence 1: choose the intransitive, and choose the time expression

   終身雇用制度が崩壊してから、若者の仕事に対する考え方は変わってきた. 崩壊する is used intransitively here because the sentence does not name who or what caused the collapse — and an English since the collapse does not name one either, so inventing an agent would add a claim. ～てから marks since in the sense of after. 仕事に対する考え方 is the standard way to say attitude towards work: に対する is a noun-modifying form and is a high-value phrase in every social topic. 変わってきた rather than 変わった because the change has continued up to now, which is what the English present perfect is doing.

2. 02Sentence 2, first half: made to work is a causative-passive, not a passive

   長時間働かせられる若者も多い. English made to work is exactly the causative-passive ～させられる: 働く gives 働かせる, make work, which gives 働かせられる, be made to work. Writing 働かれる would be the suffering passive and would say something quite different. Note also that this is a relative clause modifying 若者, so its internal subject would take が if you supplied one. ～も多い picks up many are and keeps the sentence short; the alternative 多くの若者が長時間働かせられている is equally correct and slightly more formal.

3. 03Sentence 2, second half: a plain passive with に for the agent

   会社に遠い都市へ転勤させられる人もいる. Are transferred by their companies is a passive whose agent is a person or institution, and the standard marking for such an agent is に: 会社に. によって is also possible and is more formal, but に is the ordinary choice when the agent is the party who did it directly. 転勤 already means a job transfer, so 転勤させられる is be made to transfer, which is the right nuance for a company decision imposed on an employee. へ rather than に on 都市 emphasises direction, and either is acceptable.

4. 04Sentence 3, first half: an institution acting takes the transitive verb

   政府は新しい規則を導入した. Here the agent is named, so the transitive 導入する with を is correct; the passive 規則が導入された would be right only if you wanted to leave the government out. This is the transitivity decision from the figure, made live: naming or not naming the responsible party is a claim, and the verb form is where you make it. 政府は rather than 政府が because the government has been implicitly present since the topic was set — が would present it as news.

5. 05Sentence 3, second half: hedge the conclusion, because the English does

   しかし、その効果はまだ明らかではない. まだ plus a negative is not yet, and it must be a negative — まだ明らかだ would mean still clear. 明らかではない rather than 明らかじゃない because the register here is written and analytical. If you wanted a stronger analytical flavour you could write その効果については、まだ判断できないと言えよう, using について for regarding and ～と言えよう for it may be said, but do not add hedging the English did not have: the task is translation, and inventing caution costs the chunk just as inventing certainty would.

6. 06Fix the register before you check anything else

   This passage is expository, so だ・である体 is the natural register and every sentence above is in it: 変わってきた, 多い, いる, 導入した, 明らかではない. Had you begun 変わってきました you would have to finish in です・ます, and mixing the two inside twenty marks of translation is an avoidable AO3 loss. Then run the particle check from the previous section, then read for the three fatal classes the specification names: a verb that does not match its implied subject, an unmarked change of subject, and a wrong particle with a verb of giving or receiving.

Result: 終身雇用制度が崩壊してから、若者の仕事に対する考え方は変わってきた。長時間働かせられる若者も多く、会社に遠い都市へ転勤させられる人もいる。政府は新しい規則を導入したが、その効果はまだ明らかではない。The decisions that carried marks: intransitive 崩壊する for an unattributed event, に対する for attitude towards, ～てきた for change continuing to now, the causative-passive 働かせられる for made to work, に for a named passive agent, transitive 導入する once the agent is named, and まだ with a negative for not yet.

You have one fact from your reading: many young people in Japan attend 塾 after school, and the cost falls on the household. Build a paragraph of essay-register Japanese that states it, complicates it, attributes an interpretation and concludes — about 130 characters, in だ・である体.

1. 01State the fact plainly, in the register you have chosen

   日本では、放課後に塾に通う高校生が多い. Notice the shape: 日本では sets the frame with the contrastive では, the relative clause 放課後に塾に通う modifies 高校生, and が marks the subject inside a sentence whose topic is the place. This is the plainest possible opening and that is a virtue — an essay that opens with an unarguable fact has bought itself the right to argue afterwards. Do not open with 私は～と思う: the AO4 grid rewards analysis supported by evidence, and an opinion offered before any evidence has nothing to stand on.

2. 02Complicate it with the second half of the same fact

   しかし、塾の費用は家庭が負担するため、経済状況によって通えない生徒もいる. しかし is the plain-register but; ため gives the reason; によって marks the variable that produces the difference; 通えない is the potential negative. The complication is where an essay stops being a report. You have not added new information from outside — the cost was part of the original fact — you have drawn out its consequence, which is the cheapest and most reliable way to sound analytical when your research notes are thin.

3. 03Attribute an interpretation rather than asserting it

   このため、塾は教育格差を広げているのではないかと指摘されている. Three things are doing work here. のではないか advances the claim as a question rather than a finding. ～と指摘されている attributes it to unnamed others — it has been pointed out that — which is honest when you are reporting a live argument you have read rather than one you have tested. And 広げている is the transitive verb with ている, which says juku are actively widening the gap, a stronger claim than 格差が広がっている, the gap is widening. Choose the transitive only if you mean to name a cause.

4. 04Give the other side one clause, not a whole sentence

   一方で、塾が学校の授業を補っているという見方もある. 一方で is on the other hand and is the standard essay connective for a counter-view. ～という見方もある, there is also the view that, is a compact way to acknowledge an opposing position without giving it equal space; もある does the work of also exists. In a 600 to 700 character answer you rarely have room for a symmetrical treatment, and examiners are not asking for one — they are asking that you show awareness that the question is contested.

5. 05Conclude with a judgement that follows from what you wrote

   いずれにせよ、塾の役割は家庭の経済力と切り離して論じることはできないだろう. いずれにせよ is at any rate and signals that you are closing. 切り離して論じる is discuss separately from, using the て-form to chain. ことはできない nominalises with こと and negates the potential. だろう hedges at the right strength for a conclusion drawn from one fact. The test of a conclusion is whether a reader could have predicted it from your own paragraph; if it introduces a new idea, it is not a conclusion, it is a fifth sentence.

6. 06Count the characters and check the register

   The paragraph runs to about 130 characters, which is roughly a fifth of a Paper 1 Section C answer, so five paragraphs of this density is the shape you are aiming for. Now read only the sentence endings: 多い, いる, されている, ある, ないだろう. Every one is plain register, none is です or ます, and none repeats the previous one, which also feeds the range grid. If any ending had been ます you would have found it in two seconds by this method.

Result: 日本では、放課後に塾に通う高校生が多い。しかし、塾の費用は家庭が負担するため、経済状況によって通えない生徒もいる。このため、塾は教育格差を広げているのではないかと指摘されている。一方で、塾が学校の授業を補っているという見方もある。いずれにせよ、塾の役割は家庭の経済力と切り離して論じることはできないだろう。 The architecture — state, complicate, attribute, concede, conclude — works at any length, and the register apparatus that carries it is ため, によって, のではないか, ～と指摘されている, 一方で, ～という見方もある, いずれにせよ and だろう.

Here is a candidate's draft sentence pair, written for Paper 2 Section A. 先生は生徒に本をくれました。生徒は喜んで、その本を読んで、感想文を書かせました。Find and fix everything, using the specification's own order of severity.

1. 01Pass one, first error: an unmarked change of subject

   The second sentence begins with 生徒は as its topic, then ends with 書かせました, a causative — made somebody write. But the person who makes a student write a report is the teacher, not the student. The subject has changed silently between the middle and the end of the sentence, which is the specification's example of an error that prevents meaning being conveyed. Either mark the change — 生徒は喜んでその本を読み、先生は感想文を書かせた — or restructure so the subject does not change: 生徒は喜んでその本を読み、感想文を書いた.

2. 02Pass one, second error: a verb of giving with the wrong perspective

   先生は生徒に本をくれました is wrong, and it is wrong in exactly the way the specification names — incorrect particles with verbs of giving and receiving. くれる means gives to me or to my side; it cannot describe a transfer between two third parties. The neutral verb for a third-party gift is あげる: 先生は生徒に本をあげた. If the writer is one of the students, then 先生は私たちに本をくださった uses the honorific form of くれる and is both correct and appropriate. If the perspective is the students receiving, use もらう and swap the particles: 生徒は先生に本をもらった.

3. 03Pass two: fix the て-form chain so it does not stall

   喜んで、その本を読んで、感想文を… chains three clauses with て, which is grammatical but flat, and the repeated て-form is exactly what the AO3 range grid calls limited variation resulting in repetitive expression. Use the ます-stem for the middle link, which is the written-register alternative: 生徒は喜んでその本を読み、感想文を書いた. One て-form and one stem is more varied than two て-forms, costs nothing, and reads as writing rather than as speech.

4. 04Pass two: settle the register, then check every ending

   The draft is in です・ます (くれました, 書かせました). If this is a translation of an expository English passage, だ・である体 is the better home: あげた, 読み, 書いた. Whichever you choose, read only the endings — ました, ました becomes た, た — and confirm they agree. A mixed pair is the single most detectable AO3 error in a script and takes ten seconds to find by this method.

5. 05Pass three: only now, the characters themselves

   感想文, 生徒, 先生 are all straightforward and on the assumed-knowledge side of the kanji question. If you were unsure of 喜ぶ you could write よろこんで in kana at no cost, and if you were unsure of 感想文 you could write レポート — a katakana loanword is a legitimate lexical choice, not an evasion. The specification classes minor errors in character formation as errors that do not hinder clarity, so a slightly wobbly 徒 loses nothing; a 白 written for 自 is a different matter, because it produces a different word.

6. 06Read the repaired version once as a reader, not as a writer

   先生は生徒に本をあげた。生徒は喜んでその本を読み、感想文を書いた。Two sentences, two clear subjects, one giving verb with the right perspective, one て-form and one stem, and a single consistent register. Nothing about the repaired version is more advanced than the draft — it uses no construction the draft did not — but every one of the errors that would have cost marks has gone, which is the point of a checking routine as against a rewriting routine.

Result: 先生は生徒に本をあげた。生徒は喜んでその本を読み、感想文を書いた。 The three passes, in the specification's own order of severity: first the errors that prevent meaning (an unmarked change of subject, a giving verb used from an impossible perspective), then the errors that hinder clarity (repetitive て-chaining, mixed register, uncertain kanji), and only last the cosmetic ones (character formation), which the specification explicitly says do not hinder clarity.